Stutopia Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 3 times The staff in H.Samuel know me by first name now From this thread it sounds like the staff at A&E know your nickname, birthday, favourite colour, and tyre of choice too 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ioneabee Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 ^^ this too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kraziekatz1 Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Don't believe my husband when he says he knows what a Husky looks like.....he'll come back with a Japanese Akita and they are about 60lbs bigger when fully grown and will eat a through your kitchen wall when left unattended. Also, avoid the overnight train from Surat Thani to Bangkok. It's already done more than 400 miles when you get on it and the cockroaches are really grouchy, plus you get locked in the carriages with them for 'your own safety'. Always check the catch on your loft ladder before pulling it down otherwise the telescopic bit comes flying down, cracks you in the skull and knocks you out cold. And finally, don't fall down the stairs, break your leg and then try to drive yourself to hospital. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ekona Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Yeah, I guess I'm a bit accident prone sometimes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glrnet Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 I can feel several name changes coming on Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ioneabee Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 iFall or iBanjo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linus27 Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 I innitially read that as banjo string problem 3 times :scare: I read it as why would you be playing a banjo whilst having sex and put it down to some kind of kinky sex thing. Still, I guess it's nothing compared to some of the weird and kinky things we've all done over the years with different objects right or is that just me? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linus27 Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Always check the catch on your loft ladder before pulling it down otherwise the telescopic bit comes flying down, cracks you in the skull and knocks you out cold. please don't tell me you also did this?? You so copy me with everything Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wasso Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Mr Smurf get back to cleaning your car, all you want to do these days is change peoples names Anyway back on topic and I can't believe nobody has said Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grundy Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 When you're on holiday with friends, and you know the mate you're sharing a room with is about to get laid that night, DON'T trash the room to stop him having sex! It will result in you putting one mattress on the balcony, and in the proceeds of moving the 2nd one into the bathroom to shower the mattress wet, you will knock the ceiling tiles along with the air con duct that swings down and knocks you out for a good while! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gsexr Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricey Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 I innitially read that as banjo string problem 3 times :scare: I've managed it twice......it is not pleasant! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JetSet Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Double check the destination of your train as you might finish up in Carlisle instead of Chester. Make a mental note of where you've parked your car at Alton Towers. Never sniff an unmarked jar that you've retrieved from under your sink, it may contain ammonia . Always check that the deodorant you're about to spray under your arms isn't in fact your wife's under arm hair remover. And finally, don't assume that a herd of cows are going to part like The Red Sea when you walk towards them! Pete 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stutopia Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 (edited) I innitially read that as banjo string problem 3 times :scare: I've managed it twice......it is not pleasant! Lets get Dan and Ricey together somewhere. Banjo duel!!!! Edited June 27, 2014 by SuperStu Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linus27 Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 One from today. Don't go into a bulk storage area without putting the lights on because when the wind blows the door shut, you can't see where you are going and can be stuck in there for a little while whilst trying to find the door again and avoid tripping over things. I guess it made things interesting. Another one from today. Don't try and pay for your food which is £2 by giving the girl a 2p and then attempt to convince her that it was once a £2 coin and you have no idea why it has changed into a 2p piece. Not only do you come across a bit of a fruit cake, you will also have to endure funny looks from her the next time you buy food. Finally from today and its only reached lunch. Don't touch your face with your fingers after attempting to fix the ink pad of a date stamp as you will look rather silly with black ink on your face as Kraziekatz1 pointed out to me today. Then, if you do decide to repair it again and for a third time, remember to wash your hand like you didn't do the first time as you will keep on looking stupid with black ink on your face. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ioneabee Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 sounds like you're having a good day Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linus27 Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 sounds like you're having a good day HEHE no, this is sort of normal for me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kraziekatz1 Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 Should I add.....don't leave Kraziekatz alone with the date stamp as she may change the date and then Dave will not be impressed when he returns on Monday to find everything saying 4th July 1996 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BulletMagnet Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 ...to find everything saying 4th July 1996 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harryjax Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 When caught short out doors. NEVER P#ss into the wind especially if your wearing light coloured trousers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rock_Steady Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 if for example, you're at your parents house while they are out, and decide to use the keys in the door to lock up instead of the ones in your car, DON'T put down your car keys on the work top before locking up the house from the outside and post the house keys through the letter box. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linus27 Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 (edited) Should I add.....don't leave Kraziekatz alone with the date stamp as she may change the date and then Dave will not be impressed when he returns on Monday to find everything saying 4th July 1996 No way, you didn't did you??? I so hate you You know he will blame me and then tell everyone that I can't set the date properly and I won't hear the last of it for the rest of the year Good job though, very subtle yet highly effective. Edited June 27, 2014 by Linus27 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kraziekatz1 Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 ...to find everything saying 4th July 1996 Wow, my subconscious must fancy Will Smith more than I thought....that was a completely random date I choose Linus, wait until you see what a wrote on the white board by your name......mwah hahah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linus27 Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 ...to find everything saying 4th July 1996 Wow, my subconscious must fancy Will Smith more than I thought....that was a completely random date I choose Linus, wait until you see what a wrote on the white board by your name......mwah hahah NNNNOOOOOOOOO you are in so much trouble my girl. Revenge however, is a dish best served cold. Just you wait hehe Oh and as for Will Smith, Keira Knightley says exactly the same thing and doesn't realise how much she fancies me. Funny that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alize Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 Hahaha! Love it! Don't spend £80 on a clay cut and super wax on your recently bought lovely black zed and then park in front of your garage when next doors is open and he's doing wood sawing in it! Lovely (not) mess on my zed! Grrr politely asked him to inform me in future he took it well! 😱😇 Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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