Grundy Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Never try to make a homemade knuckleduster using 10mm brass block, a Black & Decker drill, no vice and a 14mm drill bit ~ will result in said brass block spinning around on the drill bit at over 13K rpm before flying off and almost braking a shin. Then followed by weeks of going to see a nurse to repair the 10mm wide, 10mm deep hole in your shin. This made my day! Not the injury, just you with guns and home made knuckle dusters xD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Bounty Bar Kid Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Don't eat yellow snow Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GMballistic Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Never try to make a homemade knuckleduster using 10mm brass block, a Black & Decker drill, no vice and a 14mm drill bit ~ will result in said brass block spinning around on the drill bit at over 13K rpm before flying off and almost braking a shin. Then followed by weeks of going to see a nurse to repair the 10mm wide, 10mm deep hole in your shin. This made my day! Not the injury, just you with guns and home made knuckle dusters xD I can laugh about it now as it was such a stupid thing to do. I had my foot on the block whilst I tried to drill the holes through, first hole snagged and the block just broke free of my foot spinning round like a crazy f**ker before flying off the drill bit into my shin. Still got a nice scar on my right shin as a reminder not to try that again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GIXXERUK Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 (edited) Only racists see racism in race related statements The forum does not condone racism on public roads.... Keep it on the track ! Edited June 26, 2014 by GIXXERUK 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ekona Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Yeah, I hate black cars Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GMballistic Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Yeah, I hate black cars As long as you have some black cars as friends it's ok to say that. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lexx Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Never cut fresh pasta sheets on a slightly rough work surface with a slightly blunt knife. Not blunt enough to prevent it cutting the tip of my finger off, I might add. Never run after your cycling mate when aged 11, and take a short cut over wet grass. One somersault later, and my teeth left a nice imprint in the concrete pathway. Never try and get a pound coin on the roof of your mouth by putting on your tongue, then doing a handstand. It'll go straight to the back of your mouth and you'll nearly choke and die. Another one from my youth, that. Never tell a woman that yes, her bum does indeed look big in that dress. Darwin called, said he wanted a word... 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AliveBoy Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 (edited) Never try to make a homemade knuckleduster using 10mm brass block, a Black & Decker drill, no vice and a 14mm drill bit ~ will result in said brass block spinning around on the drill bit at over 13K rpm before flying off and almost braking a shin. Then followed by weeks of going to see a nurse to repair the 10mm wide, 10mm deep hole in your shin. This made my day! Not the injury, just you with guns and home made knuckle dusters xD I can laugh about it now as it was such a stupid thing to do. I had my foot on the block whilst I tried to drill the holes through, first hole snagged and the block just broke free of my foot spinning round like a crazy f**ker before flying off the drill bit into my shin. Still got a nice scar on my right shin as a reminder not to try that again. I remember at school the first (and only!) time I left the chuck key in a pillar drill by accident, luckily it didn't hit me, but the distance it flew scared the **** out of me! I can only imagine the force of that hitting you in the leg! Edited June 26, 2014 by AliveBoy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GMballistic Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Never try to make a homemade knuckleduster using 10mm brass block, a Black & Decker drill, no vice and a 14mm drill bit ~ will result in said brass block spinning around on the drill bit at over 13K rpm before flying off and almost braking a shin. Then followed by weeks of going to see a nurse to repair the 10mm wide, 10mm deep hole in your shin. This made my day! Not the injury, just you with guns and home made knuckle dusters xD I can laugh about it now as it was such a stupid thing to do. I had my foot on the block whilst I tried to drill the holes through, first hole snagged and the block just broke free of my foot spinning round like a crazy f**ker before flying off the drill bit into my shin. Still got a nice scar on my right shin as a reminder not to try that again. I remember at school the first (and only!) time I left the chuck key in a pillar drill by accident, luckily it didn't hit me, but the distance it flew scared the **** out of me! I can only imagine the force of that hitting you in the leg! I'll just say it hurt a lot and there was blood everywhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ekona Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Darwin called, said he wanted a word... I forgot possibly the best one was when I was in the swimming pool underwater and decided to try and open my eyes for the first time: To my surprise, it was all fine! No stinging, no nothing, just felt normal. In fact, so normal I then started to breathe normally whilst underwater... Yeah, don't do that kids. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AliveBoy Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Darwin called, said he wanted a word... I forgot possibly the best one was when I was in the swimming pool underwater and decided to try and open my eyes for the first time: To my surprise, it was all fine! No stinging, no nothing, just felt normal. In fact, so normal I then started to breathe normally whilst underwater... Yeah, don't do that kids. :surrender: :surrender: Did you die?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baidan Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Yeah, I hate black cars O!.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Husky Posted June 26, 2014 Author Share Posted June 26, 2014 (edited) Darwin called, said he wanted a word... I forgot possibly the best one was when I was in the swimming pool underwater and decided to try and open my eyes for the first time: To my surprise, it was all fine! No stinging, no nothing, just felt normal. In fact, so normal I then started to breathe normally whilst underwater... Yeah, don't do that kids. amazing. Although, not sure how you cope with that, my eyes turn to fire and it stings like a bitch, chlorine or no chlorine. You can't see squat either surely? When I've fought back the stinging agony I just see blurry useless. no fair though. Edited June 26, 2014 by Husky Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BulletMagnet Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Ekona = Patrick Duffy = The Man From Atlantis 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JetSet Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 I remember at school the first (and only!) time I left the chuck key in a pillar drill by accident, luckily it didn't hit me, but the distance it flew scared the **** out of me! I can only imagine the force of that hitting you in the leg! When I worked at British Steel one of my jobs was to cut and prepare samples for analysis using a hydraulic guillotine. As the steel was at this stage pretty thick (1/4") the guillotine would often jam and we had a device very much like a starting handle to wind the guillotine up. Luckily, I always removed it before I restarted the guillotine but a couple of guys forgot to remove it and took enormous damage to their shins as it would spin at an incredible rate once the machine was restarted...ouch. Dangerous places Steelworks . Pete Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stutopia Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 From this very morning. Don't flip the shower on to warm up, then a few minutes later barge straight in without checking what temperature it is. Too cold is shocking, but too bloody hot causes you to jump back through your shower curtain and pull the swine down and then water to go everywhere. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linus27 Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Don't turn your amp off prior to going on stage to play in front of 6000 people. It results in no sound coming out of your amp and looking like a complete idiot. Yes, I did that. Don't fall asleep on a tour bus. The photo's of what happens to you and the objects that appear next to your mouth are not pretty. This didn't happen to me but I admit to joining in when our roadie fell asleep. Don't try and do a Finnish flick in one of those ride on tractor grass cutters with all of your mates in the trailer in the back. Nobody including the tractor and trailer appreciate your skills or the lack off or the cuts and bruises after. Don't put a pair of jeans on with a wasp inside. I did that and it hurt and the wasp hit the bullseye. Don't close your eyes when attempting to jump over a set of double whoops on a BMX track. It results in a broken collar bone and a big cut to the face. Then, don't go to the hospital with your sister who happens to pass out at the sight of blood and ends up in the cubicle next to you. Yes this happened to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ioneabee Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Don't get drunk and then wander down a country road, feel the need to releive your bladder in the hedge only to find that there is an electric fence hidden in the foliage. you will sober up very quickly no I didn't do that, but it was funny as hell watching my mate jump 6 feet .... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stutopia Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 The wasp/jeans incident reminds me of the most important tip I've learnt to date. DO check your shoes for creatures when you've spent the last few days in the jungle. Otherwise, after a few minutes of slipping one on, you feel something funny going on, kick it off and find a f****** scorpion in there. Then you poo your pants. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiGFoetus Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 When you throw something into a flip top bin and miss, don't absent mindedly press on the pedal again whilst stooping to pick the rubbish up and smack yourself in the face with the rapidly opening lid. I did that. Ended up sat on my backside on the kitchen floor with a bloody nose and feeling like an utter tit. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paddy78 Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 If going "commando" with zipped trousers / shorts, be very careful when doing up the zip. Surprisingly, it isn't a pleasent experience... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ekona Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 I tore my banjo string having sex the night I got engaged for the first time. I still finished the job. And then I cried with pain. She thought I was crying because I was so happy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kraziekatz1 Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 I tore my banjo string having sex the night I got engaged for the first time. I still finished the job. And then I cried with pain. She thought I was crying because I was so happy. Is that common? Erm....how many times engaged then? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ekona Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 3 times The staff in H.Samuel know me by first name now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ioneabee Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 I innitially read that as banjo string problem 3 times :scare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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