ioneabee Posted January 27, 2014 Share Posted January 27, 2014 (edited) I came out of the chip shop with a meat/potato pie, large chips, mushy peas and a jumbo sausage. A poor homeless man, sitting there, said, “I've not eaten for two days.†I told him, “I wish I had your willpower!†I took my biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name two things commonly found in cells. Apparently, "young blacks" and "Romanian gypsies" were not the correct answers. A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunch time today. She said, “Sorry about the wait.†I said, “Don't worry dear. You might lose it eventually.†I walked past a black kid sitting at a bus stop, as I went into the bank. When I came out, he looked at me and said, “Any change?†I said, “No, you're still black.†An Irish boy stood crying at the side of the road. A man asked him,“What's wrong?†The boy said, “Me ma is dead.†“Oh bejaysus," the man said. “Do you want me to call Father O'Riley for you?†The boy replied, “No tanks mister. Sex is the last ting on my mind at the moment.†Years ago, it was suggested that an apple a day kept the doctor away. But since all the doctors are now muslims, I've found that a bacon sandwich works better ! I hate all this terrorist business. I used to love the days, when you could look at an unattended bag on a train or a bus, and think to yourself, "I'm gonna take that!" A man in a hot air balloon was lost over Ireland. He looked down and saw a farmer in the fields and shouted down to him, “Where am I ?†The Irish farmer looked back up and shouted back, "You can't fool me. You're in that basket up there." A woman had a medical at the doctors. “You are grossly overweight,†he said. “I want a second opinion,†she exclaimed. “ OK. You're bloody ugly as well.†Edited January 27, 2014 by ioneabee Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tigerzed Posted January 27, 2014 Share Posted January 27, 2014 What do frogs drink?? . . . . . . Croaka cola What's round and laughs a lot?? . . . . . . .A tickled onion A lorry containing terapins has crashed with a lorry containing tortoises . . . . . . . It was a turtle disaster . . . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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