Keyser Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 Hope it all works out andy, as it will. Just one of the difficulties as the littleones grow up. Lots more of these situations to come. Not nice though when its a situation you have no control over. +1 Been there its hard mate - all part of growing up (for the parent!) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twobears Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 Oh dear, poor girl I am sure that it will be worth it for her in the end though because, like you say, it is a wonderful opportunity and I am sure she will enjoy it more once she gets home, if that makes sense? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ekona Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 I'm not saying it does but that's also an extreme side of it. Most people love there kids very much and seeing their kids in pain hurts them more than themselves being in pain. like the OP. I bet if he could feel upset instead of her he would do it. It's heartbreaking to see YOUR kid like that. When your a parent you will understand… No kids for me thanks. I totally understand that it must be heartbreaking, I didn't say otherwise. What I was getting at was a possible solution, which isn't always the nicest thing in the world to do but regardless, if it's the right thing then it has to be done. If the routine carries on then nothing will change, and clearly that would be more upsetting for the child long-term as she'll always associate music camp with being upset, and someone with talent like hers that would be a massive shame. Definitely no phones should've been the rule, but then you'll get the odd parent who demands that their little precious absolutely must be able to call mummy and daddy whenever they like, and for a quiet life it's easier to agree sometimes. Not saying that was the case here, just offering a viewpoint. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stutopia Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 Stay cool, by the end she won't want to come home! I went away to school as a kid when my parents were getting divorced, and had many similar calls at first. It was tough to begin with on both ends (I only found out about parental guilt many years later, probably shouldn't have played on it so much looking back) I was only young and in a foreign country with a strange language (Scotland) but once you get over it, it's just hanging out with your mates all the time. Everyone loves that. Stay strong and she'll be all good at the end of it, if she's not begging to come home then it can't be all bad there. I'm not a parent (I've seen kids on TV though) but I appreciate it must be tough for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glrnet Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 We all managed years ago when there were NO mobile phones, yes kids got upset but as soon as they came to terms with the fact that they couldn't talk to their parents until they got home we just got on with it so from that point of view I do tend to agree that phones should have been a no no from the outset. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cragus Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 I can see where Ekona is coming from on this one. I am a teacher and attend two camps yearly with 9 year olds at the first and 11 year olds at the second. I have found in my years doing this that home sickness generally comes about when their minds are not being stimulated and they have time to think about home - this is why you find that the late night phone call is more troubling for her. I can understand the anxiety from parents point of view but I am sure she is having a great time and ultimately being away from home amongst different children from different cultures is character building stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattross1313 Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 Hope it all works out Andy i used to go away with the school/county orchestra and yeah you miss yoir folks, but as said once you hang out and joke with others you soon forgot and enjoy the trip I now hate roller coasters Is this a height issue?.......rules are there for your safety Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rtbiscuit Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 Don't make it too cushy at home or they'll never leave when they're older she'll come home and really miss it. Can't be easy hearing your own child in distress and not being able to make it better. As others have said sometimes the tough love route is often the best. I've still got all this to learn. I shall be asking advice on here I'm sure from the more experienced members in the future. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spursmaddave Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 I can just about remember what it was like to worry about mine going away for the first time..... was a loooooooong time ago I remember the first time I let my daughter go to school on her own on the Bus, when she got home I said "how was your day".... she said "it was brilliant, someone threw a brick through the bus window!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spursmaddave Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 We all managed years ago when there were NO mobile phones, yes kids got upset but as soon as they came to terms with the fact that they couldn't talk to their parents until they got home we just got on with it so from that point of view I do tend to agree that phones should have been a no no from the outset. Was that when we had to go out and catch out food and then try and make fire to cook it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spursmaddave Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 I understand what your saying Dan - what should have happened from the outset is NO PHONES - you can ring your parents after say 3 or 4 days, once and thats it !! ignorance (on the whole) is bliss I used to be a scout leader - so know exactly whats going on there - she's having a ball, but once she speaks to us or settles down for the night - thats when it all kick off. Dblock The thing is all kids are different, some there will not have a thought in their head about phoning home, that doesn't make them bad kids, and your daughter wanting to phone home and getting upset is just one of those things, everyone including kids react to things differently. I bet the phone calls get better as the week goes on Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glrnet Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 We all managed years ago when there were NO mobile phones, yes kids got upset but as soon as they came to terms with the fact that they couldn't talk to their parents until they got home we just got on with it so from that point of view I do tend to agree that phones should have been a no no from the outset. Was that when we had to go out and catch out food and then try and make fire to cook it Yup, and we never got lost relying on technology either!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jay Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 Wow,your daughter is very good mate, you should be proud. I have played the drums for 17 years and teach it occasionally as a stand in and I wish my students had snare drum skills like her lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ioneabee Posted August 26, 2013 Author Share Posted August 26, 2013 cheers all - I think we're going to have the same type of phone call every night until we collect her @Jay - and she wasn't really trying too hard in that session - I'm very proud to say the least when she auditioned to get in, she was one of 4 out of roughly 200 applicants for percussion - its got to say something 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glrnet Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 cheers all - I think we're going to have the same type of phone call every night until we collect her @Jay - and she wasn't really trying too hard in that session - I'm very proud to say the least when she auditioned to get in, she was one of 4 out of roughly 200 applicants for percussion - its got to say something must get it from her Mum Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ioneabee Posted August 26, 2013 Author Share Posted August 26, 2013 thats her mum (my missus) sitting next to her - she just happens to be a violin music teacher - now who said earlier my daughter should play the violin ?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ioneabee Posted August 29, 2013 Author Share Posted August 29, 2013 well - 1 more night to go I tell you, its been absolutely heart breaking listening to her on the phone.................but once I get down there and she tells me she was having a brilliant time I'l;, ...I'll.......I'll :angry: :surrender: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattross1313 Posted August 29, 2013 Share Posted August 29, 2013 Once you get there she won't want to come home Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spursmaddave Posted August 29, 2013 Share Posted August 29, 2013 "Daddy there is this really great music school in America......" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ioneabee Posted August 29, 2013 Author Share Posted August 29, 2013 feck off the lot of you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glrnet Posted August 29, 2013 Share Posted August 29, 2013 Actually spat beer out laughing at that ^ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StevoD Posted August 29, 2013 Share Posted August 29, 2013 When your a parent you will understand… **** i hate that saying, so what up till then i have no concept of human nature, ive not loved and lost family or friends Off topic sorry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave-350 Posted August 29, 2013 Share Posted August 29, 2013 When your a parent you will understand… **** i hate that saying, so what up till then i have no concept of human nature, ive not loved and lost family or friends Off topic sorry To be fair mate, until you are a parent, there is no feeling like it that you feel for your kids. So the saying is kinda right... IMO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dblock Posted August 29, 2013 Share Posted August 29, 2013 When your a parent you will understand… **** i hate that saying, so what up till then i have no concept of human nature, ive not loved and lost family or friends Off topic sorry Lol that's why you don't understand. You will see. You actually change as a person. When you become a parent come back and tell me I'm wrong. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave-350 Posted August 29, 2013 Share Posted August 29, 2013 When your a parent you will understand… **** i hate that saying, so what up till then i have no concept of human nature, ive not loved and lost family or friends Off topic sorry Lol that's why you don't understand. You will see. You actually change as a person. When you become a parent come back and tell me I'm wrong. +1 it's true! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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