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Things your parents used to say...


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- picking your nose will give you brain damage

- playing with your belly button will make your whistle fall off

- playing with your whistle will make your bum fall off

- if you don;t wash your hands you'll get cancer

- mums always right

- if i don;t behave she'll call the zoo an have me put in the monkey enclosure. (she actually rang them once; or so i thought, many years later she told me it was the speaking clock she dialled)

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My mum used to tell me I was adopted when I was naughty. Never thought anything of it, until this one day I found my birth certificate, my brother's and sister's one.

 

On my brother's one, it states the name of my parents. On my sister's it again states my parents names. On mine, it was blank.

 

My mother (or anyone else for that matter) never told her younger brother that he'd been adopted as a baby. He didn't find out until he was 44 when he needed a birth certificate to get married. I only found out on the day he was married, I was 24 at the time.

 

Pete

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My mum used to tell me I was adopted when I was naughty. Never thought anything of it, until this one day I found my birth certificate, my brother's and sister's one.

 

On my brother's one, it states the name of my parents. On my sister's it again states my parents names. On mine, it was blank.

 

My mother (or anyone else for that matter) never told her younger brother that he'd been adopted as a baby. He didn't find out until he was 44 when he needed a birth certificate to get married. I only found out on the day he was married, I was 24 at the time.

 

Pete

 

:scare:

 

I only found out a few years ago that I have a hlaf brother & sister....

 

BBK did Mummy say you would meet a nice girl one day :console:

Edited by spursmaddave
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- don't put your elbows on the table

- don't argue the toss

- don't forget raise your cap to Mr Turnbull (neighbour who left house at same time I did)

- don't do as I do; do as I tell you

- shoulders back, head up, stomach in, chest out (when walking)

- there's no such word as can't

- don't talk with your mouth full

- find me someone who drops litter and I will find you a criminal

- don't drop your H's

 

Just to be going on with.

 

As an aside....one of the rules at my school was that you couldn't take a bike to school until you could swim 25 yards :wacko:

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BBK did Mummy say you would meet a nice girl one day :console:

 

I've been told I'm not adopted anyways. Apparently they (the hospital) forgot to fill in my birth certificate. Also doesn't make sense when I'm the eldest child.

 

And yes she did used to say that. But now we've all pretty much given up on that happening. Esp my Dad.

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When the ice cream van plays music, it means its sold out of ice cream

 

Lies turn your tounge black

 

If you keep playing with yourself, you'll go blind

 

We found you in the bushes

 

Plus many more lies :lol:

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I was told that all those yellow flowers in the fields in the summer were mustard plants.

 

It wasn't until I was 23 when I asked my girlfriend at the time why she was allergic to mustard plants that I finally discovered they were rapeseed. I argued the toss in the car all the way home until I could google it and discovered the sad truth that I'd been lied to by my parents :(

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Not really lies, but a couple of funny things my parents used to say to me when I was a kid.

 

"If you dont stop crying i`ll give you something to cry about"

 

and

 

"If you fall down those stairs and break both your legs, dont come running to me"

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yup - "don't pull faces / the wind will change/ you'll stay like that"

and (not my parents but my great aunt) whilst I was doing headstands in my nightie (aged about 8) "That's not ladylike! Girls don't show their lady gardens" Those of you that know me will have just spat your tea over your keyboard :p

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