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Blatantly nicked from another forum


ATTAK Z

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The other day I was cruising along as usual in my BMW coming onto one of my motorways, which was very busy with inferior cars.

 

First off, I couldn't believe that the volume of traffic DIDN'T slow down for me AT ALL as I came off the slip road! I had to squeeze into a barely big enough gap between two cars in order to get onto my motorway! (The driver of the car behind me did realise his mistake though and honked an apology to me with a long blast of his horn.)

 

Unbelievably, I had to do the same again before I could get to the BMW lane. (Why do underlings use this lane? Surely everyone knows it is for BMW drivers only?)

 

Anyway, once I was in the BMW lane and posing along at 110mph enjoying the adulation that the inferior car drivers were giving me, I noticed an inferior car ahead of me which was not only in the BMW lane of my motorway, but was driving at a ridiculous 70 mph!

 

Naturally, I got to within a foot or so of his rear bumper and flashed my headlights to remind him he shouldn't be in the BMW lane of my motorway and to get out of my way.

 

Of course, once he realised it was a BMW behind him, he did just that, but I could hardly believe it when he pulled straight back out behind me! He also tried to keep up with me and when he realised I would out-run him, he put on some blue lights in his front grill and urged me to get onto the hard shoulder so that he could congratulate me on my excellent car.

 

Needless to say, I was eager oblige and when we had stopped, the man gave me a piece of paper confirming what I already knew - that my car goes fast! Apparently he wants everyone to know what a superior car I have, so I had to take my driver's licence to a Police Station to be sent away to have some points put on! (They're not free points either - they're £20 each and I was only allowed 3.) But the man at the Police Station said that because I drive a BMW, it won't be much longer before I earn the full 12 points, and then I won't even NEED a driving licence, so they will take it off me! See, now THAT's the sort of respect you get when you buy and drive a BMW.

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I was driving up the M1 last Sept with my wife in our Left Hand Drive Audi S5 in the fast lane doing "exactly" 75 MPH

 

as per the cruise control in the fast lane, when a BMW came "screaming" up behind us, a foot or so of my rear bumper,

 

felt like "left foot brake testing him" ..!! Then on came the "Blue" lights and siren..and "pull over sign", which I did onto the hard shoulder.

 

They got out and came to tell my wife she was driving using her mobile phone...When they realised that it was left hand drive and I was driving

 

we got no apology, just went through the car to find a reason to pull us. 45 mins later found nothing. What a waste ou their time and ours....Anyway

 

back on thread.. next time a BMW is up my ass "I WILL BREAK TEST IT...!!!

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Don't brake test. The correct thing is to leave a big gap between yourself and the car in front by taking your foot off the accelerator so they have to slow down too. Otherwise they can screw you for braking with no cause. Even if you are being tail gated.

And it's far more annoying :teeth:
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  • 2 weeks later...

I was driving up the M1 last Sept with my wife in our Left Hand Drive Audi S5 in the fast lane doing "exactly" 75 MPH

 

as per the cruise control in the fast lane, when a BMW came "screaming" up behind us, a foot or so of my rear bumper,

 

felt like "left foot brake testing him" ..!! Then on came the "Blue" lights and siren..and "pull over sign", which I did onto the hard shoulder.

 

They got out and came to tell my wife she was driving using her mobile phone...When they realised that it was left hand drive and I was driving

 

we got no apology, just went through the car to find a reason to pull us. 45 mins later found nothing. What a waste ou their time and ours....Anyway

 

back on thread.. next time a BMW is up my ass "I WILL BREAK TEST IT...!!!

 

This sounds typical. I was not anti police until relatively recently, when a plod pulled me over, but I denied vigorously exceeding the speed limit and quoted the speeds I knew I had been doing so he knew I was not BU_LSHI_TING and I knew exactly what I'd been doing and where. He then spent 40 minutes checking the car over, checking DVLA and not finding anything

 

I really don't understand why they can't say "Sorry for the misunderstanding, Sir, havea good journey" and letting you go. I can only put it down to their naturally miserable nature - goodness knows mixing with some of the Friday Night SC_M around my location would definitely put you off any regard for the citizenry - so they mix with some unpleasant elements, but why they can't admit their mistake (at one time they were human, not so sure any more though) and let you go without the embittered "I'll find something to screw this guy on, somehow" they seem to follow these days

 

Rant over, sorry

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