Emperor Ming Posted November 25, 2006 Share Posted November 25, 2006 Quietly enjoying my Saturday off when i get a phone call from my son asking if i could help him take down a wooden stables that he has bought. Now this leaves me with a choice. Help my lad and his mate do boy things, swear, break things and have a right good laugh or Go shopping with Mrs Ming A split second later and i am in the car and on my way. The stables turn out to be like a small bleedin BARN Oh well of we set pulling things down and shifting stuff. things are going well and al the bolts are coming out fine when I get the one that wont. Lots of pulling tugging and screaming later it eventually snaps off. No problem other than that I manage to drag my finger all along the plank of wood. OOOOOOOoooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!! F**KIN 'ELL F**KIN 'ELL F**KIN 'ELL F**KIN 'ELL F**KIN 'ELL goes the response!! When all is done its not too bad and back we go with gusto The roof is held on with bolts as well and it drops to me, as the tallest, to pull the top ones out. Using my best claw happer I tap them through from one side and then pull them out from the other. All except one. This one is right above me head and doeasn't want to shift. Pull. swear. Pull lots harder and BANG I hit myself on the bridge of the nose as hard as I can with the butt of the hammer. I thought I had broken my own nose (Who in the hell would believe that) Then it started to bleed. Then it started to hurt. Then THEY started to LAUGH!!!!! Stupid. You chuffin bet!! Ming the swollen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captint Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 Ming, in future borrow some full riot gear when doing DIY Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Removed Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 taking apart a barn???? at least it's healthier than getting drunk..... oh wait Seriously, Ming hope yr nose is ok mate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lomoto Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 hope it's not affected your film star looks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevie_350z Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 You sound like that Kenny Everett sketch where the DIY bloke was covered in blood and bandages! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digsy Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 You sound like that Kenny Everett sketch where the DIY bloke was covered in blood and bandages! Now that takes me back, mate! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M13KYF Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 think the character Wiggy from Jasper Carrot sounds more like it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyC Posted November 27, 2006 Share Posted November 27, 2006 Look on the bright side mate, you've given your lad and his mate a great story!!!! Hope you're feelin better soon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sl114 Posted November 27, 2006 Share Posted November 27, 2006 You not heard of explosives??? Sooo much more fun Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kennydies Posted November 27, 2006 Share Posted November 27, 2006 I was in a similar boat yesterday. My friend wanted help with a simple job of taking a door off, planing the bottom and putting the door back on... Took the door off no problem, rested it on a chair to plane it. There was a peice of wood stuck to the bottom and the nearest thing to hand was a penknife. (seemed a good idea at the time). Trying to lever the peice of wood off, door slips, knife slips onto my finger, door falls onto knife, knife cuts cleanly, quickly and deeply into my finger. Rinse finger under the tap to see the cut is about 4mm deep passed all layers of skin into the flesh underneath. Next thing I know friend is standing over me asking if I was ok. Trip to A&E and knew i was in for stiches when a doctor exclaims "Oh my God! that is deep". 4 stiches later and a big white condom where my finger should be... Though all of this my finger has never hurt once but a paper cut hurts for days :-) Ross Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sinbad Posted November 27, 2006 Share Posted November 27, 2006 HA Ha, Great stories.. i nearly wet myself... well you get my meaning! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digsy Posted November 27, 2006 Share Posted November 27, 2006 Though all of this my finger has never hurt once but a paper cut hurts for days :-) Ross They say a paper cut is more painful than a bullet wound - I tend to think "they" have never been shot! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevie_350z Posted November 27, 2006 Share Posted November 27, 2006 I knew a friend who burned his nob when ironing Not me, honest! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captint Posted November 27, 2006 Share Posted November 27, 2006 Steve Personal confessions should be just that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jim Posted November 27, 2006 Share Posted November 27, 2006 I knew a friend who burned his nob when ironing Why was he ironing his nob? or should that be knob? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Traktion Posted November 28, 2006 Share Posted November 28, 2006 haha, hope you're alright Ming... I had to admit that made me chuckle too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emperor Ming Posted November 28, 2006 Author Share Posted November 28, 2006 Quick update. Nose is loads better thanks. Just Red and swollen. Ming the Rudolph impersonator Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarnie Posted November 28, 2006 Share Posted November 28, 2006 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sl114 Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 concur! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trev-the-Rev Posted December 2, 2006 Share Posted December 2, 2006 After those last pics Ming posted, these could be very Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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