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PRACTICAL MORTICIAN


Vik54

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A man who just died is delivered to a Glesga mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit. Big Tam the mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out that the man does look very good in the black suit he is already wearing.

 

The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband looked his best in navy. She gives Tam a blank cheque and says, 'I don't care what it costs, but please have my husband in a navy suit for the viewing.'

 

The woman returns the next day. To her delight she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous navy suit with a subtle chalk stripe; the suit fits him perfectly. She says to Tam, 'Whatever the cost, I'm very satisfied. You did an excellent job and I'm very grateful. How much did you spend?' To her astonishment, Tam presents her with the blank cheque. 'Nae charge,' he says.

 

'No, really, I must pay you for the cost of that exquisite navy suit!' she says.

 

'Honestly, hen,' Tam says, 'it didnae cost nothin'. You see, a deed gentleman of about yer husband's size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday, and he was wearing an attractive navy suit. I asked his missus if she minded him going to his grave wearin' a black suit insteed, and she said it made nae difference as long as he looked nice.'

'So, I just switched their heids.' :shrug:

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