Jump to content

An oldie but goodie...


jim

Recommended Posts

Probably a repost, but worth another look anyway.........

 

 

 

 

Banned from the co-op

 

 

Yesterday I was at my local CO-OP buying a large bag of Purina dog food for my loyal pet, and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

 

 

What did she think I had - an elephant?

 

 

 

So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in hospital last time, but that I'd lost 2 stones before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

 

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again.

 

 

 

(I have to mention here that practically everyone in the queue was now enthralled with my story.)

 

 

 

Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her "No, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an Irish Setter's arse and a car hit us both".

 

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...