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Friday funnies


smudga

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Oneliners

 

 

 

Honestly some folk will take offence at anything, I met a bloke with

no legs this morning while at the bus stop, all I asked was "How areyou getting on?"

 

Paddy was in the delivery room when the midwife handed him a black baby.

"Is this yours?" she asked "probably" said Paddy "she burns everything

else"

 

A gypsy girl sent an email to an agony Aunt "I am 12 years old and

haven't had sex yet, do you think my brother is queer ?"

 

My missus has just gone into hospital with 2 black eyes and a broken

jaw!

It seems we were on different wavelengths when she said she wanted

decking on the patio

 

Vicar booking into a hotel asks the receptionist "Is the Porn channel

in my room disabled ?" "No" she replies "its just regular porn you

sicko"

 

A biker goes to the Doctor with hearing problems "Can you describe the

Symptoms to me". "Yes.....Homer is a fat yellow lazy bastard and Marg

is a skinny bird with big blue hair!!"

 

And then there was my mate who'd just been fitted with a brand new

hearing aid. "It's the best in the world", he said. "What type is

it?", I asked and he said "ten past twelve".

 

Drinking is Like Yoga, or is Yoga like drinking?

Food for thought.

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