Jump to content

Golf and a new partner - A tad rude


Zummertor

Recommended Posts

Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf course when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them,

 

"Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up."

 

"Sure," they said, "You're welcome to play with us."

 

So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the company of the newcomer. Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the newcomer,

 

"What do you do for a living?"

 

"I'm a hit man," was the reply.

 

"You're joking!" was the response.

 

"No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag, and pulling out a beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight.

 

"Here are my tools."

 

"That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said the other friend. "Can I take a look? I think I might be able to see my house from here."

 

So he picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of his house. "Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic."

 

"I can see right in the window."

 

"Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom."

 

"Ha Ha, I can see she's naked! Wait a minute, that's my neighbour in there with her."

 

"He's naked, too! Those Rats!"

 

He turned to the hit man, "How much do you charge for a hit?"

 

"I'll do a flat rate, for you, one thousand pounds every time I pull the trigger."

 

"Can you do two for me now?"

 

"Sure, what do you want?"

 

"First shoot my wife. She's always been mouthy, so shoot her in the mouth."

 

"Then the neighbour. He's a friend of mine, so just shoot his dick off to teach him a lesson."

 

The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a few minutes.

 

"Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently.

 

"Just be patient," said the hit man calmly, "I think I can save you a grand here."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...