mbs Posted May 7, 2008 Share Posted May 7, 2008 That glorious day when, heading into work on the bus, or walking to the tube, or sitting on the train, you find yourself suddenly chirpier than you have been in months. You find yourself smiling at strangers again. And then you get a text around lunchtime from a mate which says: "At last, Tit Monday!" And you instantly understand why you are so happy. For Tit Monday is that special day in the year when, for the first time, the temperature rises above that magical point which causes girls getting dressed in the morning to decide to show a bit of skin. After months of dull colours and chunky knit, the world's birds suddenly dive into last summer's wardrobe (they've not had chance to buy this season's stuff) and chuck it on without a thought. Your urban landscape is suddenly lightened with acres of naked arm and leg and, after many dark months of burrowing, breasts rising to the surface like moles at dusk. And you know it is nearly summer. For previous generations, the arrival of spring was heralded by the sound of the first cuckoo. For us, it is Tit Monday. Not that it always falls on a Monday. Like Easter, Tit Monday is a moveable feast. Last year it fell on a Friday. Friday 29 April, to be precise, when temperatures maxed out at 22.1C after nothing much above 16C all year. It last fell on a Monday in 2004, when temperatures leapt to 22C on 24 April. And then, of course, there is Tit Monday Night. You see, in early summer, temperatures drop off very dramatically when night falls (Tit Friday 2005 dropped away to a parky 11.8C). But the dollies are not prepared. Slightly stunned by the morning heat, they drag out the summer clothes but forget to bring a cardie (a mistake they will not make again until next year), so that when they're all standing outside All Bar One after work celebrating the arrival of spring, their barely covered nipples have no protection from the cold. It's like a Bring-and-Buy sale where everyone has brought hat pegs. It's like a prog-rock gig where, instead of lighters, everyone is holding up nipples. So when will Tit Monday fall this year? Will you be the first to text your mates with the announcement? Do not shoot your bolt too early. There will be false starts. You will smell fresh cut grass and see a couple of early starters and feel compelled to declare Tit Monday. But your more level-headed friends will tell you to hold your horses, keep your powder dry, don't fire until you see the whites of their bra straps. As the poet said: one bold Northern slap*er in a bikini doth not a summer make. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lomoto Posted May 7, 2008 Share Posted May 7, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chesterfield Posted May 7, 2008 Share Posted May 7, 2008 Brilliant - I think its today here. In Chesterfield town centre I think it occured in December 1994 and hasnt stopped since. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tmJak Posted May 7, 2008 Share Posted May 7, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funkymofo Posted May 7, 2008 Share Posted May 7, 2008 definately today here too.I actually realised I work with a few birds that arent half bad for the first time....and I started in December. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stanski Posted May 7, 2008 Share Posted May 7, 2008 Genius - you should get that published! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zummertor Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Pure poetry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
martinmac Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris`I Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Brilliant - I think its today here. +1 - definately lots of ladies about in lovely summer wears Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
H5 Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Can't say I noticed....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sl114 Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 If you could see what the girl was wearing when she just walked past my desk! You KNOW this statement is true. Mmm pink silk dress, low cut and short! Hubba hubba Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ab350z Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Agree with this, even in Aberdeen its hotting up. I drive past the University on my way to and from work and its definitely got a lot more flesh coloured this week Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M13KYF Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 It's been Tit Week let alone Tit Monday Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nixy Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 You lot are so blokey sometimes it's embarrassing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndySpak Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 It was definitely Tit Monday in London yesterday... and again today for that matter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stanski Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 You lot are so blokey sometimes it's embarrassing! Your right Nixy its terrible behaviour In our defence its just pure genetics - we have no control over it - honest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trev-the-Rev Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 Tit Monday has definately arrrived at my university Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stanski Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 seems like another diversion on Sundays' run then - maybe we should start South Wales and work our way North!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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