Your symptoms sound identical to mine mate. Excruciating pain daily in the spine, and frequently numb right leg. Im 29 now but had surgery in 2008 at 24 which I would deem a failure. Like you say, the mental anguish is the hardest part, realising you can never do any proper exercise/sport again.
My surgery was to put a piece of artificial ligament in my spine which was supposed to ease the pressure on my discs. It was a horrible surgery and I was still struggling to walk 6 months later. Even now I can't be on my feet for more than 30mins, and I'm on the same coco 30/500 daily.
I hope you find a cure... I'm to scared to face surgery again as it was prett horrendous.