Emperor Ming

Why would you want to put something into your fuel that does nothing to enhance the performance. I am sure that it would not mask the red in red diesel, and like I said before red diesel is inferior to normal diesel with plenty more sulpher in it. From what the customs guys showed me there is a chemical reaction with the test that they do that shows the presence of the red dye even if not visible to the eye. Some European diesel is red in colour anyway and they can easily tell the difference between this and the home grown variety. Ming the thought Provoking

What better feeling is there than helping some arsehole who desperately deserves it ....... get what he deserately deserves Ming the Content PS Did you leave your friends at school cos i have lots NOW!! All 5-0 or the dear ol C&E i bet!! I got more mates who are crooks than cops and TBH rarely drink with work buddies as the conversation always ends up with work. My poker club has over 50 members and although it started out a cops thing has only about 20 in it now. - see. other people like to drink with us, or is it just that they want to say that they took money from us?????? Anyway, aint all the guys on the site buddies?? Car clubs!! I'm in three at the moment and I can count on one hand the bobbies in the clubs. Anyway. You guys are only to quick to be our mates when you get a ticket/have a complaint/have grief with the neighbours/want any sort of police type advice!! (PS I have NEVER failed to give advice in any of the clubs i am am member even if it means explaining how to complain about a fellow officer.) On a slightly - only slightly - more serious note. the reasons cops drink with cops is easy really. 1. We don't get .... " .... "a mate of mine got caught doing 31 in a 30 and a traffic officer with a bazooka stopped him and issued him a £3000 fine and twenty zillion points on his licence what should I/he do" questions. 2. We can relax and not worry that our every word will be quoted by the same guy that did 31 in a 30 with retribution on his mind 'cos you rozzers are all the fu**in same' and mis quoted in a report to a divisional commander - you think I jest!! NOT!! 3. Occasionally we want to talk shop and when you have had a few you have no idea who is listening. 4. We like to trell ever increasingly tall cops and robbers stories and only other cops believe them/show any interest in them/have the patience to listen to them!! . Ming the Vindicated. PS Don't bet with an inveterate poker player mate he might just take you seriously

The frightening thing is that the Customs guys have a little safe on their great big van. They can - and did - take Cash as well as Switch, Visa, Barclaycard just about anything!! The offenders Aunt three times removed could turn up with her plastic and they will take that. They most definately are not fussy. Ming the Surprised

Why do you think they call me MING?????????????????????? Ming the Dopelganger Is it cos your minging? Nope. Its cos I am Emperor Ming the ruler of all the known universes. Ming the All powerful Is this you? Yup Thats me LOL Apart from the forhead adornment I could be looking in a mirror Ming the Copied

Why do you think they call me MING?????????????????????? Ming the Dopelganger Is it cos your minging? Nope. Its cos I am Emperor Ming the ruler of all the known universes. Ming the All powerful

What better feeling is there than helping some arsehole who desperately deserves it ....... get what he deserately deserves Ming the Content PS Did you leave your friends at school cos i have lots NOW!!

Why do you think they call me MING?????????????????????? Ming the Dopelganger

A bit of advice I was given before I set up my pay pal account. Open an account with NO OVERDRAFT FACILITIES to use JUST for pay pal. Put in it just enough to run what ever you do on E shopping. If it gets too full move cash out (You can always put it back) Don't leave too much cash in your pay pal account - only what you need. That way they can only get what you can afford to loose. Just my thoughts Ming the Helpful

Heres a little true story that happened to me two days ago. On Thursday morning I attended an address in relation to a villain who we thought was importing lots of illegal fags and was using red diesel in his cars. (If rumours are true he is also a nasty piece of work with elderly neighbours and residents) Got there and tried knocking at the front door to no gain. The high wooden gate was locked and the only way to the back door was through a wooden fence panel. We managed to lift up the panel and one of my lads climbed underneath and tried the back door. Again to no gain. (We later found out that they had been on holiday) This guy being a bit of a villian had CCTV cameras outside his house that recorded in best technocolour and over a LONG period. We leave empty handed and my traffic buddies go off to catch car criminals. The next day I receive a mmessage from one of our telephone call handlers that an irate woman had called up having seen me on her CCTV camera breaking into her house through the fence and DEMANDED to know what I was doing at her house Together with my merry band of warriors I toddled off to the house, invited myself into their living room and told the man of the house why I had attended. I mentioned red diesel and good as gold he took me into his garage and showed me four empty 'gerry' cans that he had used to buy 100 litres of red diesel to 'kill off some trees'. I then told him I was going to get the Customs and Excise people to dip his car tank to see if there was red diesel in it. He agreed as there was no red in his car. Twenty minutes later they turn up and proceed to dip his nice new Astra estate. The diesel looks alittle pink and he admits to having put red in it three months ago He thought it would have gone and was there for confident that he would not be detected. We then said we wwere going to dip the tank of his car parked on his drive. At this he royally spat the dummy out and stomped off into the house. I got him back out and 'persuaded' him to help us Initially he said he couldn't find the keys and the Customs guys were having trouble dipping the tank so he was told that the customs guys would call out a fitter to assist them at a cost of £200 that he would have to pay irrespective of what they found Of course we found LOTS of red in that one. He was interviewed by the customs people and admitted driving the new estate car. Immediate fines as follows: Red diesel in new astra £250 Red diesel in other astra £250 Driving new astra with red diesel £250 Total £750 Pay up NOW or have BOTH cars towed. He again got the hump but gave in and his passing comment was "Guess this is getting caught RED handed" He went upstairs and came back down with CASH This is a guy just back from two weeks in Benidorm on a drinking holiday and with no permanent job. I only laughed a little bit. Moral of the story. If you see Mr Ming on your CCTV don't let your angry wife call the cops because he was there for a DAMN GOOD REASON I don't always catch them the way they expect but I always catch them. He He He!!! Ming the Satisfied

They 'aint got it yet mate!! Just look out for one up your arse with a driver with a manic grin. If I find out i will let you all know. Ming the helpful

Just out of interest guys read this link about 'warped' discs. Its good reading and not to heavy even for the techno phobes like me. www.stoptech.com/tech_info/wp_warped_brakedisk.shtml It explains quite a lot. hope it helps Ming the considered

Sorry mate I did not have my camera with me at work. Ming the Apologetic

Hi Guys and Gals A mate of mine in a car crime unit based around a few pro active traffic cops turned up today to help me with a red diesel job. The job did not come off but he turned up in their latest fully liveried cop car. All the checkered stuff down the sides, blue lights on top and all the buzzers tweeters and sirens. What was it. A Mitsubishi EVO V111. :shock: Now we all know these cars are quick but in the hands of a high speed professional they are awsome. We were travelling with a T5 Volvo and they were not in the same ball park. They are soon to get an FQ320 UNMARKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ming the Stunned As a funny aside we were travelling along the motorway with the Volvo 200 yards in front. The Volvo was doing about 90mph and every car behind it was hanging back but doing the same speed. At one stage we were right behind a Mondeo that was travelling at 95 and was so keen to watch the Volvo cop car in front that he did not see the one in his rear view mirror even though we were flashing our headlights!!!!!!!

Hi Mate Tiptronic will be cheaper than manual and there are a fair few options trim and accessory wise so shop about. Drive a few first and see how they feel so you will know a good one rom a bad one. Delivery should be SILKY smooth and the gearbox possibly slightly notchy. No clunks bangs crunches etc. Good hunting Ming the Happy

Everything - and I do mean EVERYTHING - is a matter of degree. There is no way I would put a Nismo spoiler on my car as I think it spoils the rear lines but that is MY opinion. I also agree that often 'less is more' but EACH TO THEIR OWN. I could show you pics of cars that I would not even sit in, but their owners think that they are the dogs danglies. I think MUCH more important than what MOD is done is how that MOD is done. Quality and finish are much more important than the style in my opinion. After all i am the man with a PURPLE engine bay!! Ming the considered

Hi mate Still with the purple for the time being!! I have picked up my metal front cover but I have a few issues with it and need to try it on the engine first before I spend the time getting it up to powder coating standard - a lot of work I might add. I have not completely written it off but it is not what I wanted to be fair. i have found a guy who does ally welding and says he could make on in aluminum but he wanted a LOT more cash. I may well have to go down this route and get a custom one made up that does not try and replicate the original. i also have a nice blingy oil filler cap and plenty of ideas to keep me going in the cold winter months. I will keep you posted mate. Ming the sleepy PS Hows your gearbox? Is it going to need a replacement?

F A may sound a touch louder Don't be daft. The stick has got to be good for 6 or 7 horse power. Put it on the side of your door and its worth three more Ming the Pickled

Can I have your purple stuff? If, as and when the time comes it may Ming the ingenious You mean Mrs Ming the ingenious I hate to say it but she 'aint been wrong yet mate!! Ming the happy

Can I have your purple stuff? If, as and when the time comes it may well be up for offer. I am going to persue the colour scheme to see what it looks like when I have finished it but Mrs Ming - the font of knowledge of all things decoration and style - has suggested a different colour scheme that although less obvious may well be a lot more classy. We shall have to wait and see!! Ming the ingenious

Each to his own is my motto. I would never disrespect another guys work even if I didn't like it because they have put effort into it and that is what it is all about. There will be those amongst you that look at my engine bay and politely go 'nice' and privately go 'URRGGHHHHH!!!!!' At the end of the day though if I like it then that is all that matters. Its all about personal taste - or lack there of!! Ming the content PS I am already considering an amended colour scheme.

NEW platinum has got to be better than 20,000 mile old iridium. I also have the iridium in th garage should i ever need them - NOT. For the sake of £50 I would change them back to iridium if I ever thought that it would make a difference but since MOST of the time I drive like a granny I guess it wont!! Ming the Sharp Spark

The way I see it, it is of interest to site members what we do as we do it so to speak. I have plenty of ideas and just enjoy working on the engine bay. H5 said from day one he would do his all in one go and i said I would do it bit at a time. I looked into the bay today and found something else to polish that I am SURE no one has polished on their car yet and although it is not obvious when it has been done properly it WILL be noticable It is little things like that i am sure will make all the difference. For once in my life I believe that it is being in the race that counts and winning is second!! Ming the Happy It's probably nothing to do with the bits you're thinking about polishing up, but it occured to me as soon as I got the Z that the material on the top of the radiator and the surrounding area is particularly dull. Is it made of a thermal plastic or something that it has to have that strange finish? It was the very first thing I noticed when I lifted the bonnet. I am sad in that one of the first considerations I have when buying a car is what I can do under the bonnet! There are options available that I am considering but other things are first. The most common one - and there or the one I will almost certainly NOT take - is a carbon fibre replacment. I will have to take it off to see what is underneath it and what it does before I decide exactly what i am going to do but i am sure I will do something! Infact I have just had a brainwave. Thanks for brining up the subject!! Ming the Happy Already got that one sorted Ming! Carbon, Carbon, Carbon, Carbon, Carbon, Carbon, Carbon, Carbon, Carbon, Carbon, Carbon, Ming the Cheeky

since it's an import God knowns what those Japs did to it, your car will have had some sort of FI on it where Iridium plugs are needed, then taken the blower off to sell it: basically it'll blow up soon mate Thanks for that mate. I fell so much better for that bit of information. I hope your next SH*T is a hedgehog Ming the Happy

The plugs I took out WERE iridium tipped plugs. I checked them yesterday and it says Iridium on the white porcelain piece. I put platinum plugs in because the manual said platinum plugs. So did all the sites that sell plugs. So I put them in!!!!! I dont know why mine had iridium plugs in as it has only done 22,000 miles and as such would not have had a plug change! Hope this helps Ming the Puzzled

Toothpaste is only like a fine solvo - although I wouldn't clean my teeth with solvo. You can buy Farecla Rubbing compound as well in various grades which does exactly the same thing but a lot more expensively and it doesnt taste as nice. Ming the Agreed