Tarmac@TarmacSportz

How do you start an argument with a chav? Speak! What do you call a chav in a tastfully decorated house? The burglar. What do you call a Chav in a box? Innit. What do you call a Chav in a filing cabinet? Sorted. What do you call a Chav in a box with a lock on it? Safe. What do you call a Chavette in a white tracksuit? The bride. What do you call a chav in a 350z ?

O oh.... I wear a cap on occassions init blood, Ave also not bin on dis site longer dan six month ya na !!! Plus I is got a massive Nissymo spolier and NINETEEN inch allies WORD

You obviously didnt get caught by the rozzers then

Im not talking sick as in readers wives subscribers That stuffs just wrong !! Im talking illness sick.... I am very rarely ill 'unless self inflicted' but for the 2nd time this year ive been hit by the lurgy. Mrs Tarmac is ill too plus loads of family and friends are ill. Is anyone else noticing it more this year ? Its making me nervous

you'll be able to take a leak in the street again without getting a fine Ha ha - how did you know I got done for that ? my Facebook ?

TAXI for Tarmac

RIOT

Umm... you didnt answer the question though Me duck

WTF is cinders ??? Is that a yorkshire thing ??? If im bad I get a lump of charcoal or a satsuma ?? that kind of thing or am I way off mark here ???

OMFG I hate hate hate hate hate it when someone says its a chav car !!!! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

wish you hadnt asked? oh and tarmac, this is your xmas pressy you cap wearing chav Admittedly I do on occasions where a cap, merely to hide my receeding hair line, I would hardly say I am a chav tho Feel free to buy me that cap tho, I'm still waiting for my stubby from Vik n Nix

that's not where my brain is located Vik

I hope you wash your hands well, if not can you sterilise the box for Shift now please? Don't worry dude its spotless Thanks for your kind words Stew.....

Seriously dude, do you really want a girl thats interested in you just cos of your car ?? Decent girls should just like you for who you are and not what you drive..... Get yourself out on the razz with the lads, pull some moves on the dance floor and buy some chicks a drink. Most 'nice' girls arent that materialistic, and tbh would you really want one that is high maintanance women are a pain in the butt Good luck Finally the irishman speaks sense I was thinking that is probably the most useful thing Tarmac has posted. It has nothing to do with Zeds, but never mind! I will take that as a compliment - I think I definately remember posting something informative about car cleaning once, but your right I don't add much value when it comes to the Zed I'll get my coat

Seriously dude, do you really want a girl thats interested in you just cos of your car ?? Decent girls should just like you for who you are and not what you drive..... Get yourself out on the razz with the lads, pull some moves on the dance floor and buy some chicks a drink. Most 'nice' girls arent that materialistic, and tbh would you really want one that is high maintanance women are a pain in the butt Good luck

Need for speed - Shift £25 SOLD Colin Mcrae - Dirt 2 (In the first Dirt box - mistake by Asda) £15 SOLD These two are still available if anyone interested Need for speed - Undercover £15 Grid - Race Driver - £15

Deadly serious

Think its the case of "Opinions are like assholes. Everybody's got one and everyone thinks everyone else's stinks" To quote Mr Harry Callaghan That is hilarious - can I use that in the future please

Being totally honest with you ade... ive been beating the ladies off ever since I got my Zed... At first I was enjoying all the attention but after I had slept with approx 1000 ladies the novelty started to wear off, ' plus I had to have a few visits to the local gum clinic' which were not pleasant might I add. Nowadays since I impregnated one of the lucky ladies the attention had died down a little, I think its because im giving off a 'don't even go there ferromone' to the ladies. To be honest im not fussed about all the attention any more, sex with a woman can be great fun, but its not like the real thing. Im content with a nice meal for tea, bang babes on channel 912 and a roll of quilted toilet paper these days...

ahh man .... The slow motion crash testing was frickin hilarious Brilliant.

:lol: what does that involve? Hmmmmmmmmm - you wanna the d-i-a-g-r-a-m-s ? don't want to get a first select colour and size Tarmac on the right Oi Cheeky git ! Only just noticed the lickle writing dawg !! My banana ain't bruised. !!! LOL

agh dude that sucks ass !! Could not have happened at a worse time bud !! Still think the ps3s are more reliable then gay boxes tho. Keep ya chin up and get well soon !

just to remind you 2nd show of 7 at 9pm tonight bbc2 They are building an electric car Plus Corvette ZR1 goes up against the audi R8

dammit, theres only so long you can war with a mod before he locks the OP Ha ha, Sausage jockeys get my vote

Let's be honest, I don't think any of us would kick her out of bed for a slice of pizza 'even if it was to say to that prick Cashley ' I've had ya missus and she was shite'. But what I will say is that she has definately gone down in my estimation after this years xfactor. She has shown her true colours and been bitchy and didn't even sing live, I've gone off her. I voted her mate Kimberley Btw the missus makes me watch that crap