A Memo from Human Resources.....
In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity
from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained
through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.).
We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T. than anyone else. If
you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T., please see your
supervisor. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T .
list, and our supervisors are especially skilled at seeing that you get
all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.
Employees who don't take their S.H.I.T. seriously will be placed in
DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS ( D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T.).
Those who fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to
EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T.).
Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T. before they were promoted, they
don't have to take S.H.I.T. anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T.
already. If you too are full of S.H.I.T., you may be interested in a job
teaching others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of
LEADERS (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.).
Thank you,
BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G.S.H.I.T .)